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ENTRUSTED with our readers’ deep secrets, the Dear Deidre team really have a unique insight into what dilemmas the nation is grappling with. Of course, there are some constants — cheating, differing sex drives, low self-esteem and loneliness. But some issues loom larger in certain years as new problems come to the fore. As 2024 nears an end, we take a look at what exactly our readers have been writing in about. Every year, we help thousands of people by answering every single dilemma with a personalised answer, and we’ve kept a record of the issues we’ve tackled. Relationship issues consistently come out on top, with 23 per cent of the emails Dear Deidre receives focused on romantic problems. Sex came a close second, with 19 per cent of readers writing in with a sexual dilemma. Interestingly, half of every single relationship message addressed cheating. Sometimes, the unfaithful party would be writing in, otherwise a suspicious or heartbroken partner worried about their relationship. Among the emails about cheating on partners, home surveillance and doorbell cameras featured more prominently, with some partners forgetting to turn off cameras before inviting flings to come back to their homes. A growing number of readers also wrote in because, although they were separated, financial constraints meant they could not move out of the marital home. The reluctant house sharers were frustrated at being unable to move on — a trend that reflects economic uncertainty in the UK. Notable developments this year have been new requests for support with quitting vaping. Another new issue came in the form of pensioners worrying about losing their winter fuel allowance. Social media has been a common theme in all the categories. It is impossible to quantify but has had a huge impact. So many of the relationship problems relate to partners ogling scantily clad influencers or flirting with others they have met online. Plenty don’t see this as cheating but the feeling of betrayal is real for those on the receiving end. And it’s not just cheating that worries people. Time spent watching endless videos encourages weird infatuations, with one woman complaining her husband had become obsessed with the French election. He insisted they spend their family holiday in France watching speeches — and had previously had no interest in politics. The issue of phone addiction came up, particularly for parents fretting about not only what their children were being exposed to, but also how their mobile activity was affecting their own behaviour. They asked our team for help on how to manage this. And a huge number of adults wrote in fed up with their partner, who had little interest in them but spent all hours playing online games or scrolling through their socials. It’s clear that while technology enables us to do far more and do it efficiently, left unchecked it threatens our real-world connections and provides more opportunity for temptation. Next year, I will be recording when social media, phone usage and the internet are mentioned as part of the problem, and I predict this will be a huge growth area. Below is a reader’s letter about ogling, followed by one about winter fuel allowance. I also break down what percentages of our mail different types of letter make up. DEAR DEIDRE: MY ex saw me having sex with a one-night stand using the camera security system he’d installed as a favour to me. I was completely unaware that he was watching this, until he turned up the next morning and got very upset with me. Originally, I was grateful for his help setting up the system, but now I feel really uncomfortable. He said he’d received an alert on his phone and checked it by chance, but I can’t help worrying he’s keeping an eye on me. He insists he hasn’t been watching and that was a one-off, but the whole experience has really unsettled me. I’m 36, my ex is 39, and we were together for eight years before we broke up five months ago. Our split was both mutually agreed, and amicable, and we decided to remain friends. We still met up and sometimes even had sex, but as we didn’t discuss what this meant I thought we were simply friends with benefits. I really appreciated still having him in my life. When I was moving house, he offered to help, knowing how useless I am at DIY. He helped put up shelves, and installed security cameras which he set up online so I could view them through an app. I knew he had access to it all while he set it up but assumed he’d log out. So when I brought a man home, I didn’t think twice. Now I feel mortified. He says he didn’t mean to breach my privacy, but I feel so conflicted. DEIDRE SAYS: Watching you have sex with another man was a huge breach of your privacy, and you shouldn’t take it lightly. As a priority, please ensure that you are the only one with access to your security system. Make sure you’re the primary account holder and change your password so that he doesn’t have access. It’s completely understandable that this experience has made you question the sort of person he is. Unless you decide you can trust him completely, you would be wise to stay away. At the very least, it’s clear that the lines are blurred between you and your ex and some boundaries need to be re-established. As for your relationship with him, you need to decide if there’s any hope of a future together. If you decide there’s not, it would be best to step away so you can both move on. My support pack Moving On will help. DEAR DEIDRE : SINCE the Government cut my Winter Fuel Payment, I’ve been struggling to afford my bills. Now I’m forced to choose between putting my heating on or buying food, and the stress is making me unwell. I’m a 76-year-old pensioner, and live alone. Until this year, I was receiving £200 payments to cover the cost of my heating bills, and I heavily relied on it. So when the Government announced the change, I went into a complete panic. My pension is already low as it is, so without the extra payments I knew it was going to be a hard couple of months. When I contacted the council for help, they told me that, while I was eligible to apply, I had missed the deadline so now I’d have to go without. Ever since, my life has been an absolute nightmare. Now I wake up every morning to a freezing house – and no matter what I do, I can’t keep warm. The constant dread is getting me down, and I’m now struggling to cope. DEIDRE SAYS: I can only imagine how distressing this must be for you. While the qualifying week for this year’s Fuel Payment has now passed, you may still be eligible if you successfully apply for Pension Credit by December 21. Please note that you only have two days to do this, so please take action today. You may also be eligible for a £150 Warm Home Discount. You can find out more about this on the government website ( gov.uk/the-warm-home-discount-scheme ). TOP TOPICS: Relationships 23% Sex 19% Family 8% Parenting 7% Friendships 4% Workplace issues 5% Mental health 11% Health 5% Addictions 8% Bereavement 5% Sexuality 4% Other 1% SEX WOES Sex drive 43% Fetishes 16% Threesomes 12% Erection problems 11% Fantasies 7% Climaxing 4% Menopause 3% Other 4% LOVE Cheating 49% Domestic abuse 12% Addictive love 10% Broken heart 14% Online romance 6% Age gaps 5% Other 4% ADDICTION Alcohol 42% Porn 22% Drugs 13% Smoking 8% Vaping 5% Gambling 9% Shopping and spending 1%None

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Aoge Tech: What's Orange Silica Gel? It's Features and ApplicationsZAGREB, Croatia (AP) — Croatia’s incumbent President Zoran Milanovic won most of the votes in the first round of a presidential election on Sunday, but must face a runoff against a ruling party candidate to secure another five-year term. With nearly all of the votes counted, left-leaning Milanovic won 49% while his main challenger Dragan Primorac, a candidate of the ruling conservative HDZ party, trailed far behind with 19%. Pre-election polls had predicted that the two would face off in the second round on Jan. 12, as none of the eight presidential election contenders were projected to get more than 50% of the vote. Milanovic thanked his supporters but warned “this was just a first run.” “Let’s not be triumphant, let’s be realistic, firmly on the ground,” he said. “We must fight all over again. It’s not over till it’s over.” Milanovic is an outspoken critic of Western military support for Ukraine in its war against Russia. He is often compared to Donald Trump for his combative style of communication with political opponents. The most popular politician in Croatia, 58-year-old Milanović has served as prime minister in the past. Populist in style, he has been a fierce critic of current Prime Minister Andrej Plenković and continuous sparring between the two has lately marked Croatia’s political scene. Plenković, the prime minister, has sought to portray the vote as one about Croatia’s future in the EU and NATO. He has labeled Milanović “pro-Russian” and a threat to Croatia’s international standing. “The difference between him and Milanović is quite simple: Milanović is leading us East, Primorac is leading us West,” he said. Though the presidency is largely ceremonial in Croatia, an elected president holds political authority and acts as the supreme military commander. Milanović has criticized the NATO and European Union support for Ukraine and has often insisted that Croatia should not take sides. He has said Croatia should stay away from global disputes, though it is a member of both NATO and the EU. Milanović has also blocked Croatia’s participation in a NATO-led training mission for Ukraine, declaring that “no Croatian soldier will take part in somebody else’s war.” His main rival in the election, Primorac, has stated that “Croatia’s place is in the West, not the East.” His presidency bid, however, has been marred by a high-level corruption case that landed Croatia’s health minister in jail last month and featured prominently in pre-election debates. During the election campaign, Primorac has sought to portray himself as a unifier and Milanović as divisive. Primorac was upbeat despite such a big defeat in the first round. “I know the difference (in votes) at first sight seems very big,” said Primorac, who insisted that the center-right votes had split among too many conservative candidates. “Now we have a great opportunity to face each other one on one and show who stands for what,” he said. Sunday’s presidential election is Croatia’s third vote this year, following a parliamentary election in April and the European Parliament balloting in June.

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Croatia's incumbent president gains most votes for re-election, but not enough to avoid a runoffBarry Keoghan has seemingly responded to rumours that he cheated on Sabrina Carpenter with TikTok star Breckie Hill . The news of pop star Sabrina, 25, and actor Barry, 32, "taking a break" was only announced on December 4, but keyboard warriors claimed that Barry had been unfaithful after he was spotted with Breckie in a hotel in Hollywood . Barry took to Twitter today to clear his name, and stand against the "lies and hatred" spread about him from trolls on social media. "I can only sit and take so much. My name has been dragged across the internet in ways I usually don't respond too. I have to respond now because it's gettin to a place where there are too many lines being crossed," he wrote. "I deactivated my account because I can no longer let this stuff distract from my family and my work. The messages I have received no person should ever have to read them. Absolute lies, hatred, disgusting commentary about my appearance, character, how I am as a parent and every other inhumane thing you can imagine." The Saltburn star continued: "Dragging my character and everything I worked extremely hard for and stand for. Talking about how I was a heroine baby and how I grew up and dragging my dear mother into it also. Knocking on my grannies door. Sitting outside my baby boys house intimidating them. That's crossing a line. "Each and every day I work harder to push myself on every level to be the healthiest and strongest person for that boy. I want to provide opportunities for him to learn, fail and grow. I want him to be able to look up to his daddy, to have full trust in me and know I will have his back no matter what." Barry concluded: "I need you to remember he has to read ALL of this about his father when he is older. Please be respectful to all. Thank u x" The Irish star was talking about his son, two-year-old Brando, whom he shares with his ex-girlfriend Alyson Kierans , who works as a dentist in London. Barry recently lashed out at fans for suggesting he was snubbing his son in favour of the Hollywood life, and leaving all parenting to London dentist Alyson. While speaking on Louis Theroux's podcast last month, Barry opened up about growing up in foster care and his mother's death from a drug addiction , and took umbrage with accusations he was a “deadbeat dad.” "If I didn’t have tough skin or the strength to have, I wouldn’t be sitting here. Of course, (my childhood is) going to affect me being a father when I had no blueprint to take from. People just read that (as) laziness and go, ‘Oh, that’s no excuse to be an absent father’. I’m not an absent father,” he assured Louis. When Barry and Sabrina's split was announced, an insider old People : "They are both young and career-focused, so they've decided to take a break." The insider added that the split was amicable, and suggested that the couple wasn't over for good. * Follow Mirror Celebs on Snapchat , Instagram , Twitter , Facebook , YouTube and Threads .

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